lunedì 8 ottobre 2012

The 14 Focal Points of Personal Growth #12 Service

In regards to service, what is the issue at hand? What specifically is meant by service and how can it aid in your success? Service here means putting forth an external effort to aid others emotionally, socially, intellectually, or financially. It is not necessarily or specifically just about going over to old Mrs. Jones’ house and mowing her lawn. Good, but that’s only part of the picture.

First, being in the service of others can be simple and non-interventive. For example, through acceptance of differences and lack of judgment, merely allowing someone to have their say is a form of service . Other forms are encouragement, presenting helpful ideas, a thoughtful act, a word of appreciation, a timely suggestion. The list goes on and on. What you are doing is basically shutting down your interests, your thoughts, your concerns, worries, and desires and replacing them with the concerns of others. This is neither time consuming nor difficult to do but can have a substantial affect on both the giver and receiver. You may already do this in small increments and not even be aware that you are having a positive effect on people. In doing these things you become a hero, a Robin Hood to those in need. You steal from the enriched (you) and give to the poor (the emotional needy) in heart. Or you may not have much to give, feeling down, depressed, despondent, and by giving in this manor find yourself energized. As you serve others, you get outside of yourself. You begin to focus on others and away from your concerns, thoughts, desires and needs. This getting outside of the self works wonders on mental and physical health. You will find depression subside, confidence increase, and a desire to do and be more than ever before. You may even find the universe assisting you to help others and to help you in the most dire of circumstances. On September 11 th , 2001, several men were working their way up the stairs of the south tower which had already been hit. After going up twenty flights or so, the north tower, the first to be hit, began to collapse. The men knew immediately the tower they were in would collapse as well. They began moving quickly down the steps, knowing that any rescue effort heading up would be wasted. As they did so they heard a woman groaning. She lie on the stairs immobile, unable to get up. With the collapse of the tower imminent, they knew that any delay could mean their lives. However, they also knew that they couldn’t pass this woman leaving her helpless. They picked her up but doing so slowed them down considerably. As they reached the fourth flight they heard a sickening sound, that of the tower collapsing. They knew they weren’t going to live. The thundering crash told them they only had seconds to live. Or did it? As it turned out, if they had been one level higher or lower they would have gotten crushed. the floors above were gone and below them lay nothing but rubble. But because they were at the promenade, the structure provided a protection, preserving their lives and the life of the woman they sought to save. As we reach out to others we will find not only find people desiring to help us but a greater power will intercede to do the same. There is a movement now in the secular world of business that giving or tithing, as Mark Victor Hansen (Chicken Soup for the Soul) calls it, is essential to one’s success. But it is not the giving with reward in mind that aids one here but the giving over concern for the betterment of the self or the one giving where the blessings come. Sometimes these blessings can be the most unexpected if you’re not helping to merely receive reward. When I was teaching, I had several students who encountered difficulties and challenges, and if they asked for help I more often than not listened and gave some possible insights into solving their problems. Afterwards, on occasion, some students contacted me to express their thanks. Not looking for praise, it was always a pleasant surprise to hear or read their words of appreciation, this being one of the most rewarding aspects of teaching. And once again, being the recipient of these appreciations is not the result of Herculean efforts but simple efforts consuming little time. However, the rewards are great. For example, one day while walking on campus, a student flagged me down to thank me for helping her with her writing. She simply stated that if it wasn’t for my help and patience she probably wouldn’t have graduated from nursing school. Minor acts can certainly have major rippling positive effects. On another occasion, outside of the teaching experience, an acquaintance from Boston wrote me in Los Angeles to tell me that she was grateful for some advice that I had given her, advice that to me was insignificant and long forgotten. However, it had saved her a lot of grief, if not her life. After encountering this problem, she had decided to go to the liquor store and buy a bottle of alcohol. This was a woman who did not drink based on personal and religious reasons. And if she started drinking, she knew that this would send her down a road she didn’t desire, one that she may have a difficult time getting off. That which saved her was a suggestion I had made years ago. Being a single woman, I suggested that if she ever ran into a problem she couldn’t handle to seek authorities in her church for assistance. She did so and was able to veer from the road she was heading down, not that she couldn’t have thought of the solution herself, but having support and encouragement from others put her over the top. More times than not we need advice, hope, and help from others to lift us up just enough to save us from greater grief or even save our lives. But why is it the simple, the uncomplicated, that without great fanfare that lifts and instructs? Maybe it’s the universe’s way of cluing us into a vital principle, saying to us that if we help each other we will receive help. And maybe if this clue were given to us in a loud, agitated manor we wouldn’t listen. What moves us to great delight the most from the lady or gentleman we love? Screams of agitation and aggravation or whispers of joy? What is so important about simple deeds? Herein lies one of the great mysteries of life. Certainly we remember the elaborate: weddings, great adventures, births, graduations; however, the quite and subtle often speak to our souls, our eternal nature. It is here where we are the most receptive to these subtle yet profound messages. It is in the whisper, the slight touch, the soft cry, the subtle look, that leaves us with a lasting impression, for it is here where the profound, the intelligent, the eternal lies. In the long run, it is the subtlety of service, a reaching out to others, where not only true healing takes place but true understanding of our purpose and how we are able to best effect our lives and the lives of others-others to the extent and degree that only we can determine by our desire to help the few or the many. And whether one is working in the public or private sector, as your desire grows from that of helping a few to the many, the universe will see your basket is growing and will fill it according to your will and desire.

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service, success, motivation, personal growth, self help, tithing, giving,

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